Do I despise myself?

"That's the trouble with the world. We all despise ourselves." ~ Charlie Chaplin



‘De meesten van ons worden, naarmate we ouder worden bang; we zijn bang om te leven, bang om een ​​baan te verliezen, bang voor traditie, bang voor wat de buren, of wat de vrouw of man zou zeggen, bang voor de dood. De meesten van ons hebben angst in een of andere vorm; en waar angst is, is geen intelligentie.” ~ Krishnamurti

Waar angst is, is geen ruimte voor liefde. De enige intelligentie die er toe doet is goddelijke intelligentie. Angst blokkeert mijn bewustzijn van die intelligentie. Goddelijke intelligentie is een geweldig, ingebouwd GPS-systeem dat altijd ‘aan’ staat en toch zelden wordt geraadpleegd, en nooit als ik bang ben. Als ik bang ben, heb ik nog steeds het belachelijke verlangen om de maker van die angst te vragen een uitweg te vinden... gebeurt nooit. Angst leidt tot meer angst.

Liefs, Diederik


“Most of us, as we grow older, become frightened; we are afraid of living, afraid of losing a job, afraid of tradition, afraid of what the neighbors, or what the wife or husband would say, afraid of death. Most of us have fear in one form or another; and where there is fear there is no intelligence.” ~ Krishnamurti

Where there is fear there is no room for Love. The only intelligence that matters is divine intelligence. Fear blocks my awareness of that intelligence. Divine intelligence is an amazing, built-in GPS system that is always ‘on’ and yet rarely consulted, and never when I am in fear. When I am in fear I still have the ridiculous desire to ask the maker of that fear to find a way out ... never happens. Fear leads to more fear.

Love, Diederik

* Diederik is the Founder and Program Director of Choose Again


“The only thing wrong with trying to please everyone is that there's always at least one person who will remain unhappy. You.” ~ Elizabeth Parker

That is because my need to please comes from a belief that I am not lovable. If I please you enough, then, maybe, you will love me. That will never work. It is I who has to fall in love with the Self. When that happens people pleasing becomes second nature and there will be no expectation of reciprocity. It mutates from people pleasing to a genuine extension of Love. Cool.

Love, Diederik


"Be willing to be a beginner every single morning." ~ Meister Eckhart

Be willing to wake up free of all past judgments; be willing to wake up full of curiosity; be willing to look at my partner as if I have never seen her before. The result of this active willingness is an unreasonable experience of Love, Peace and Joy.

Piece of cake?

Love, Diederik



"Overcome any bitterness that may have come because you were not up to the magnitude of the pain that was entrusted to you. Like the mother of the world who carries the pain of the world in her heart, each of us is part of her heart and is, therefore, endowed with a certain measure of cosmic pain. You are sharing in the totality of that pain. You are called upon to meet it in joy instead of self-pity.” ~ Sufi saying

So often I believe that the pain I feel is greater than I could possibly be. So often I take refuge in self-pity. And then I take a deep breath and recognize once again that it is impossible that anything could ever go wrong. And at that moment I see what is being offered in truth. At that moment I overlook my initial (almost automatic) response of resistance to what IS. At that moment I Know that what I saw as ‘pain’ was a gift waiting to be opened.

Love, Diederik


"Overwin elke bitterheid die kan zijn ontstaan omdat je niet opgewassen was tegen de omvang van de pijn die je werd toevertrouwd. Zoals de moeder van de wereld die de pijn van de wereld in haar hart draagt, maakt ieder van ons deel uit van haar hart en is daarom begiftigd met een zekere mate van kosmische pijn. Jullie delen in de totaliteit van die pijn. Je wordt opgeroepen om die te ontmoeten in vreugde in plaats van zelfmedelijden." ~ Soefi-gezegde

Zo vaak geloof ik dat de pijn die ik voel groter is dan ik ooit zou kunnen zijn. Zo vaak vlucht ik in zelfmedelijden. En dan haal ik diep adem en erken ik opnieuw dat het onmogelijk is dat er ooit iets mis zou kunnen gaan. En op dat moment zie ik wat er in waarheid wordt aangeboden. Op dat moment zie ik mijn aanvankelijke (bijna automatische) reactie van verzet tegen wat IS over het hoofd. Op dat moment weet ik dat wat ik zag als "pijn" een geschenk was dat wachtte om geopend te worden.
Liefs, Diederik


And you do not realize that you are not afraid of love, but only of what you have made of it.

A Course in Miracles

(textbook, chapter 18, paragraph 3, 3th alinea, 6th line)


Unorthodox Thinking?

"Tradition becomes our security, and when the mind is secure it is in decay." ~ Krishnamurti.

The ego knows that what I want is the Eternal and so it drags in shabby substitutes to provide me with the illusion of eternity. Tradition is just one of many clever ideas it presents. Eternity, however, is free of all form, totally abstract.

Diederik Wolsak



"I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia." ~ C.S. LEWIS

So often someone has a struggle with the idea of being 'unchangeably innocent' ("look at the evidence, I must be guilty"), we ask: how would it feel if it were possible that innocence and love were your essence? "Great!" Well then go with that. Both are just ideas, choose one that makes you feel fantastic for now till the truth becomes undeniable.

Diederik Wolsak


Sane Conclusions?

"What if I should discover that the poorest of the beggars and the most impudent of offenders are all within me; and that I stand in need of the alms of my own kindness, that I, myself, am the enemy who must be loved -- what then?" ~ JUNG

What then? Well, then, I start looking at and transforming all the reasons I consider myself 'the enemy'. Those reasons are the foundation of the enmity: I made them up, I have to 'unmake' them. They are always and totally insane. I am unchangeably loved and unchangeable Love.

Diederik Wolsak


The "right" way?

"If I know the way home and am walking along it drunkenly, is it any less the right way because I am staggering from side to side!” ~ TOLSTOY

Never, ever, ask the ego how you are doing. You are on your way home and that, in itself, is perfection.

Diederik Wolsak